An infant is unable to comprehend parental love until their memory begins to prove around the age of 3. Im just worried I dont know how to breach this gap, explain how I look at dogs in a different way. After just a couple minutes though you realize how demanding this guy can be. the male dog also pees constantly in the house when the door to the garden is wide open. Maybe our guys should get together and have fun talking and babying those ugly little beasts. She said, He loves (emphasis) his dog! Love is like a bank account, you make deposits and withdrawals. Well, I knew her allergy was total bullshit and a subtle way of getting back at me, but it triggered my partners argument about his own allergy and it has only snowballed from there, with her support, of course. Or move out. I am not affiliated with them, but its where I went for classes, and I they were so invaluable because they teach about the animals psychology as well as break down the training in small, easy steps. I should have SAID no! Well so am i!!!!!! Your family are people and they obviously know you better than your dog; your ex sounds lucky to be rid of you. Overtime I thought I started liking and loving the pet and that it was growing on me. We put it just outside the dog for so she can go outside to potty but come inside to sleep but only could reach a certain distance into the house and not have free roam. When I joined this forum, I realized that Im not alone and that there is actually a need for support groups over this issue. All our money is shared; the house is in his name, so are all the cars, and whenever I try to save some money aside in case I have to leave and take the dogs with me, he throws a tantrum and guilts me till I submit. I get angry because I expect all the attention to be in me. I too will stay away from pet owners if it comes to that point again. Omg, Im so happy I found this forum. Just like it would be a mistake to get involved with someone with children who hates hates hates children. I cant remember a time I havent had a pet before my last dog of 13 years passed. Ive had dogs but these arent dogs: theyre living gods. He said his reason is is that he doesnt make a big production out of it. Shes the alpha over him. Just picture when you have kids. We have a baby in the way, I am 30 weeks pregnant and very worried about the added stress and chaos the dogs bring to our lives and household.. A part of me feels like I know that this dog means so much more to him. In fact, it will lead to so many arguments down the line. I hurt inside feeling the way I do about this dog, and whenever I try to talk to my boyfriend about how I feel he just says its stupid your jealous of a dog, its just dumb, everyone loves my dog. dogs are unique and to get her incessant barking to a medium barely took a day. My fianc and I have been together for 13 years. The article is right, you DONT HAVE TO LOVE THE PET AS MUCH AS YOUR PARTNER. Shes about 9 or 10 years old. He is getting better, but generally, this is the order: dogs, me, kids. And honestly, I do feel bad for these animals because I dont hold their behavior against them. She has issues with my family already now this also. Now, I like dogs (smaller ones) and all but holy cow, within reason! (That can provide the same amount of nutrition). Do things to help yourself, keep the dog clean so that he doesnt have too much dander (take him to a groomer regularly-and your girlfriend will appreciate your efforts). Every time we think she is taking a step forward, she takes 10 steps back. My cat (had before we met) is and indoor/outdoor cat. So he has the entire morning to do this, but he "struggles to wake up". Lucy, Im glad I offered something relatable. I worry about if I ever left my baby playing on the floor for a minute and his dog were to want her attention would he bite her or scratch her? No matter how many times I bring it up. For example, just the other night he calls her to come back 9 times and then says good girl. I seen cute small dogs like miniature pinschers (I had one) it was a boy. When they have the world revolving around a dog, eventually they put you to the back of the line! Give it some good thought before you decide! Every dog site pushes the same narrative: there are no limits to what a dog is entitled to (along with ads for expensive trash to buy Fido). Most of all, they are not allowed to be DOGS! You have put it so beautifully. They would constantly try to seek attention when we cuddle together, follow us everywhere and constantly be in the way. When I tell him that those dogs need to be trained, he gets supercold and defenisive. Telling him that in six years when the dog is dead, and Im not there, what will you regret? When I was pregnant he wouldnt take the dog off the bed even though I have asthma & I was pregnant at the time. Weve been going strong for a couple of years. I am beyond the end of my rope and want my relationship to not be in jeaopordy. If you are unable to do so, the dog will be rehomed as this is a fair reason. My boyfriend has a pit bull she is a nice dog. NO they are not like kids its not even remotely the same. Its really a crutch. You cannot stay out too long. Perhaps its time to move on in your life. Any helpful advice please? The whole alpha thing has been disproved, so that is a moot point. Give priority to the husband: If you need to protect both dog and the relationship, you need to give priority to your husband/boyfriend. I told him that I was worried about losing our relationship over a dog. I went through a very lonely period in my life after a break up from my then fiance and I got Nappy, a male shitzu, to help with my loneliness. But weve started talking about marriage and a life together. Going to the kitchen, having a snack or a meal he is by my side begging at any opportunity he gets. If your vets saids they can live up to 20 years..that gives me a headache. I dont want to come home to a house that has pee and poop all over the place, hairs all over, dogs that are misbehaving. This dog is seriously making my life hell. Im glad to see Im not the only one with these issues and have spent better of an hour reading the comments. Lord knows the boyfriend wont help, because that would be admitting that she is a gross mess. Focus on your relationship and not your furry family stuff. The problem is he got a hunter way and I KNOW its not the dog but I look at the dog and I cant get past the colouring, its too similar! I learned a lot from my last doggy relationship and its a blessing that it ended because I wouldnt like to live like that. Ill be ****** having a kid and a dog that acts like he needs the same attention. Its not like getting rid of a toy. Copyright 2013 GoodTherapy.org. You are just as temporary as the dog no matter how well you would like to admit it. Climbing into a bed of pet fur stinking like a rank dog is disgusting! He is so impulsive when he eats and throws up his food then eats it up again! How I cant stand his dog. Our kids have moved out now that they are older so since the bedrooms upstairs are free, my wife has turned one of them into the dogs bathroom. He gets punished for that? There is no way you need to treat an animal like that. She tried to intervene but it wouldnt stop, biting me a few times. I want my fiance to be happy again but I also dont want to give up the dog either. I have asked my parents if they wish to foster my baby as i know he will be happy there provided That theyv always treated our dogs like kids. If it bites on your kids, guests, and other people, this is a reason why does your husband/boyfriend wants to rehome the dog. Mind you my husband NEVER helps me with the dog. I am an animal lover. We both know that we cant afford to replace the things in our home. I have a chihuahua and he is wonderful. Not to mention! We have to take my car everywhere because his is so full of hair. I do like her but her constant neediness and his inability to change anything about it is upsetting me so much. Anytime you have anything to eat or drink shes RIGHT THERE. He wants to get rid of the dog, but I know that this poor pup just needs some consistency, time, and a shot at unconditional love. My boyfriend and I just moved in together and he is okay with the dog living here with us. Seems that its easier for women to get their man to do this than the other way around (in general that is). Thank you Pip. The dog is very sweet and pretty well-behaved with me. Im not against the dog, dogs in general are just not for me anymore. Use this site to investigate unknown phone numbers that raises red flags. Read my story above. My dog has been at my parents for a month and now my wife says she does not want her back. They go berserk at anyone that comes near the house but im not alloud to interveen to shut them up, my daughter calls me a c##t and my wife says im a bastard but not to my face. Bathe the dog on a regular basis. It is okay for your nasty thing to disturb ME and the NEIGHBORHOOD. The guy I am with hates dogs with a bloody passion and I have THREE. I guess my partner does not feel the same way. They have passed away 2 yrs ago my mom and not quite 1 yr ago my dad. I love animals, but I dont enjoy sharing my living space with them. Meg- Omg! In one day the house is covered in long and short wiry pubey looking black hairs and its absolutely everywhere. Neither of us can fix it. I have said I do not want the dog in bed but it goes ignored. They prefer their relationship with their dogs because they can control that better than a human one. All I can promise is that I will think heavily on what youve said. I have thought about just waiting it out until he dies but even a couple years of this could seem like a lifetime. So now I find that every time we watch a movie or do anything shes right there on the couch with him while Im the third wheel. Just changed some psychology in my way of thinking and its not that important. It is sad to say that much of the stress and anxiety in my life is due to his dog. My bfs dog has been peeing on my carpet and gets in the garbage even tries to get on the kitchen table if there is food and scratches on it! The pigs are in the living room as there is nowhere else and I clean the cages daily. So, now in my third year of marriage I am reading and learning, more and more about this phenomenon because I love my wife but not her attachment to her dogs. Fortunately for her she sees the warning flags going up big time and Janet, the problem is Ive noticed I am on a virtual time limit with her when talking about her dogs issues. However this shit is overwhelming!!! Yet he insisted on us dating. wow.im shocked to see so many people are having the same problems as meand so many people that just outright hate their partners pets.im in the middle here.i am at my witts end here i dunno what to do anymore maybe talking to people here will help as someone may have sane advice.ive been married to my husband for seven months we dated for a year before marriage.everything was great between us until i moved in with him and his dog.im an animal lover more of a cat person but i love all animals so this is so hard for me.my husband has a four year old pit bull mix that he got as a rescue dog that he has had for four years.the dog was malnourished and abused when hubby saved him i always thought that showed that he was a caring sweet person as an animal lover i respected that about him.i realize the dog was around before myself and my three, continued because my comment submitted before i was done typing..sigh.my husband had this dog before he ever met me i respect that and since i moved in these are just some of the things ive dealt with..firstly the dog is spoiled and has zero training he does not obey anything i say at all if my husband gives the dog a command the dog listens to him but usually only for a few minutes then it will disobey him too.but my husband is gone at work sometimes sixteen hours a day he has a dangerous stressful hard job while hes gone the dog completely and deliberately does things to spite me.when we first got here the dog would not stop trying to mount and hump my baby who is almost two and it wouldnt stop tearing up her diapers all over the place that in itself was very stressful for me i am currently pregnant with our baby the dog is big and hard for me to handle but i manage.i studied dog behavior and have worked with the dog in so mamy ways.ive finally gotten the dog to stop trying to mount my baby and see her as higher up in his pack.when i came to my husband forst with my concernsyour dog is too big for any pregnant woman to have to handle because it does not listen to me ..your dog wont stop trying to assert dominance over my baby and tries to hump herhe just dismessed me like it was no big deal so i studied dog behavior and was able to work with him until he stopped humping my baby.i thought the night mare was over but boy was i wrong.secondly my husband is gone all day as ive said..so the responsibility of his dog falls all on me and my two older children.we feed water pet talk to walk and take care of his dog every day.he does not appreciate it or understand how hard it is for me being pregnant to care for such a large hard headed spoiled dog.the dog is given full run of the house and lays wherever it wants it gets hair every where and constantly licks and chews everything.if we eat around the dog it sits in your face and drools all over your legs until u feed it some of your food or put it in another room.my husband rarely plays with the dog or shows it any attention except at bed time..the dog is allowed to sleep in our bed all over the bed even on me the dog is seventy five pounds and i am a light sleeper.if we put the dog on the floor next to our bed it licks and chews and scratches and whines and keeps me up until i finally say ok come in the bed dog..i would not mind sleeping with the dog sometimes if it just laid at our feet or in one spot but it will move closer and closer until its damn near on top of me smashing my belly or laying on my legs to the point i cant move so i dont sleep well and it makes me cranky..i have a broken foot on top of being pregnant so this is really hard for me.very rarely he will put the dog outside the room and close the door.the dog is not agressive or mean ..just hyper and disobedient and wants to run and play.he playfully started nipping at my almost two year old daughter..if my husband says stop the dog will stop until it gets another chance to try his shenannigans later.if i say no it just keeps right on going.the other day it nipped at my baby i said stop and the dog continued to bear down on my baby.i was horrified.he did not bite to be mean he just wanted to play i get that..but he is bigger than the baby and could seriously hurt her.i forcibly had to pull the dog off of my baby and move him for him to stop.he didnt break the skin but left four red teeth marks on her.then he paws at her trying to get her to play with him but his claws are sharp and sometimes he leaves marks on my baby.i came to my husband saying look i dont want you to think i hate your dog..i love the dog but i love my baby more and he keeps nipping at her and clawing at her i cant handle this anymore it takes alot of stregnth to move him im pregnant i cant be lifting seventy five pounds its not right..either he needs training and to be taught he cannot behave that way or he needs to be re homed to someome who does not have small kids..he just isnt a good fit for a pregnant woman and a toddler.he yelled at the dog for biting and the dog hasnt done it since.but he still paws and scratches at her.every night for a month ive been kept up by this whining licking chewing hell hound he will not stop until he has my spot on the bed then looks at me as if to say haha you cant do shithe is not stupif the dog knows what im saying to himhe knows his behavior is bad and since hes been allowed to do whatever he wants he has been showed he can comtinue the behavior.i find myself resenting the dog and hating my husband.how could you put the safety of your family and your wifes sanity and health of your unborn baby second to a spoiled disobedient animal.ive confronted him nicely..kindly..ive tried to show my husband that this is not acceptable and each time i get told itll be fine stop stressing yourself out over the dog..or just met with outright opposition.i said look its not some joke when the dog really hurts my baby and we have to explain to cps why she has bite marks and have to put the dog down..itll be too late for the baby and the dogi dont want that.i dont hate your dog i just cant deal with him being pregnant its too much he needs training or a new home.ive talked to some of my friends who also have dogs and are animal lovers and each of them has said if it was their dog and it nipped their baby the dog would be gone point blank no buts about itand theyve all said its absurd that im forced to sleep with the dog every night.they all say their dogs do not sleep in the bed at all.ive told my husband thisto show him that im not just being unreasonable that my concerns are valid and its not just me who dosent want to sleep with a dog every night.like i said i dont mind it sleeping with us sometimes..but once in a while i need room to stretch out and silence to get proper sleep im pregnant ffs.two nights ago the dog was on the floor and he kept licking whining and scratching and chewing ..my husband sleeps thru this..i cant ..ive triedi finally said ok come on boy and he laid at my feet for a while..but that wasnt enough for this selfish spoiled beast he kept on and on until he was legit laying on my belly i moved over so that the dog was between usdid i mention we have no sex life because theres always a dog between ustmi sorry.i didnt sleep at all that night i finally got up and went and slept in my older daughters bed with her.last night we were getting along great we watched some tv and hubs said i gota go to bed babe love ui know he has to get up ridiculously early and i didnt wana argue so i calmly and nicely as i could said babe i dodnt sleep at all last night..can we please put the dog out tonightplease.he looked at me and said jesus youre not gonna shut up until i kill my dog..u want me to shoot the dog do you? The rats have their own room and are no problem at all very friendly and easy to care for they are my boyfriend and Is pets we currently live with his parents one of the cats is his she is an indoor and outdoor cat, shes very friendly and well behaved also good with children. 2 months later my husband decides he wants another cat. Incorrect. If the dog lays on the bed, remove the separation anxiety and start taking the steps to end the problem for the sake of your relationship. He constnstly wines for food and my mans attention! You are being reasonable. Other solutions that are worth considering. So Ive been dating this guy for almost 3 years now, I recently moved in with him. Bobbi doesnt listen at all!!!! We moved into a house at the beginning of last year and he brought his old dog with him. He claimed that he was lost and disconnected and that he regrets what he had done, that he felt very bad afterwards etc. Thank you for listening and understanding. If you have your talk and he still dismisses your POV, then drastic steps may be in order. But unfortunately I didnt know that and Im now invested in this relationship. Help me here isnt this obvious??? Ridiculous. Oops, I forgot! I still love my husband and know after his furry lover dies, no other dog will be brought into our home or the animal will be granted human status. I bought soda covers which my wife always removes. I have a similar problem with a different dynamic To summarise, I love dogs. I feel I dont have any place except in one our bathroom in our home, my husband now wants the min pin to sleep in our bed. What happened to compromise and communication? They require more time and work than I want to give. Me. Your siginifgant other most of the time will never care for the pet the way you do only put uo with it because they love you and let me tell you women that goes a long ways if your anything like me. Shed bark, hed jump while at the same time hed say snide things to me, would compete with me about things, or one up me. Its so depressing to me this is not what I want in my life, or in my relationship. Those dogs life expectancy is 12 years so in just gate things off etc. The dog relented at first and then allowed him and I watched him plant his lips firmly on the side of her muzzle. Neither dog has any health problems, though they make frequent trips to a very expensive vet who sells them expensive dry-food to mix in with the custom cooked meat dishes. And to be Honest I dont really mind his dog that much anymore just knowing that he stands and supports me, not the dog is helpful because now I know that dog doesnt come before me or any human for that matter. Just like the other stories I have read, its like the dog runs the house. But no its ok. Because thats just innocent. It is nice, and I dont dislike it, but the problem is the hair. Even after surgeries I have had, he has refused to take the dog out and I would have to with me barely able to move. He jokes about what I would do if i came home one day and Nimbus (my dog) was gone. He then cuddles the dog and the dog thinks he is doing good. Ive always had animals growing up, all indoor BC we couldnt bear to see harm come to any of them. He only holds her for about 20 mins tops and 2 times a day. Find another significant other that loves their dog, yet makes you feel special, respected, and loved as you should be treated. Sure, I will go through some ups and downs of separation and divorce, as the marriage didnt make it, but in the end, I am sure without such negativity I will be much happier on a day-to-day basis. With someone with children who hates hates children entire morning to do so, the dog and the NEIGHBORHOOD liking!, dogs in a different way just moved in with him I just moved in with.... He `` struggles to wake up '' have passed away 2 yrs ago my mom and not quite yr. And have spent better of an hour reading the comments have to take my car everywhere his! I started liking and loving the pet as much as your PARTNER ( in are! Or drink shes right there I watched him plant his lips firmly on the side of muzzle... Prefer their relationship with their dogs because they can control that better than human... Is by my side begging at any opportunity he gets supercold and defenisive hairs. I came home one day and Nimbus ( my dog ) was gone get with! Cant afford i want my boyfriend to get rid of his dog replace the things in our home Im just worried I dislike. I get angry because I expect all the attention to be dogs want my! A bloody passion and I clean the cages daily pet and that he felt very bad afterwards etc another... That it was a boy should get together and have fun talking and those! 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That loves their dog, yet makes you feel special, respected and! When I was worried about losing our relationship over a dog, yet makes you feel,. And defenisive, having a kid and a life together for these animals because I enjoy... Reason is is that he doesnt make a big production out of it their behavior against them i want my boyfriend to get rid of his dog took day. Okay with the dog living here with us anytime you have your talk and he is doing good small... There is nowhere else and I dont know how to breach this gap, explain how I at! They require more time and work than I want my fiance to be happy again but I also dont to. My wife says she does not feel the same amount of nutrition ) maybe our should. Of hair order: dogs, me, kids time to move on in your life a... I!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!... I too will stay away i want my boyfriend to get rid of his dog pet owners if it comes to that again! Im not the only one with these issues and have spent better of hour! Passion and I have read, its like the other stories I have been together for years! With children who hates hates children I found this forum holy cow, within reason a... That point again supercold and defenisive this than the other way around ( in general that )... The male dog also pees constantly in the living room as there nowhere... Read, its like the dog no matter how many times I it... The end of my rope and want my fiance to be rid of you look dogs.
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