NC DSS had done an interstate compact but I dont believe it had fully gone through yet. Amen Brother! Dearest Rhonda, Hi my name is Brandi, and I had my 2 sons ages 9 & 11 kidnapped by cps unfairly!! The next day I notified our foster worker that he needed to be seen as he was still very sick. Its all Ive ever known. Why? Because my sons (they took my two youngest, ages 6 and 13) want to be home with me. The 5 Stages of Grief is a theory developed by psychiatrist Elisabeth Kbler-Ross. 187-214). God Bless You! Someday soon, my kids will find me, and know that there was never any reason for them to be kept away from me. To those that can easily criticize, you've never walked in my shoes. My six children are gone amd were given to my ex, the abuser. God has given me the grace and mercy to handle this. Well Im bout ready to give up..I dont wanna even think about what might happen from this point..yesterday was my last stateso here I sit..witj sleep mess and wine..smh..if I what else to do..Im gonna go crazy n Id rather for before that. I hope this helps God Bless You! I dont know what else to do. So the main differences between grief and depression are: Grief is an emotional response to the loss of loved ones, and depression is a clinical syndrome. The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not want. Psalm 23. I called my caseworkers superviser supervisor. What would that make them feel like? unwillingness of family or friends to continue talking about the loss. Thank you. I'm still a kid myself! I was honest! Dallas, Talk to your attorney about filing for the appeal. Ive been depressed for years but this is a whole new type of depression. I have been in and out of hospitals for suicidal ideation. I asked them for help and they did before they opened a case on me and then CPS told them to stop talking to me. I crocheted a blanket for each of the kids. Parents with Mental Illness and Child Custody Issues . Remember what Jesus told Pilot when asked if he was a king, Jesus answered, My kingdom is not of this world: if my kingdom were of this world, then would my servants fight, that I should not be delivered to the Jews: but now is my kingdom not from hence. (John 18:36) Im feeling your pain! We were an hour from being discharged and they stole him. I caught so many illegal things they did in my case I wanted to go public. You can join a support group for people struggling with divorce or custody issues or even one that has to do with people coping with depression. There is hope for your future, says the Lord. Did you go to court? People tell me all the time to stop thinking of them, because it makes my nerves worse. This is my third time involved with dcs. A woman with hollow eyes approached us and handed out a flier. She called back and said she would take him to the Dr. and I needed to pack his favorite things as she was going to get him in an hour and after the Dr. visithe would go into his permanent foster/adoption home. I have tried numerous times to kill myself and am trying tonight. And the state is telling me that my daughter will not be reunited with me as long as Im there because its not considered stable housing. You might believe you don't measure up to other people in terms of looks, age, or weight. I have to think that theyll soon be 18 and able to make their own decisions!! financial distress form california. They can also present very differently in men versus women. You can also take effort to build positive relationships amongst friends and family at the same time, if it is possible- keeping an open channel between you and the other parent can also be helpful. I have also considered checking out. I hope he will be returned to you soon. My new born son was just taken from the hospital from me when he was 4 days old hes 4 weeks today. But if youre not going to have future children, Id fight this with all Ive got at a TPR hearing using expert witness testimony and legal documents. There is a spiritual battle going on that is bigger than America. Expect it, and accept it, Its our destiny. I lost my children three girls in 2011. If you got your situation published or on TV maybe the adopters would see it and agree to let your grandchild visit with you. I live in Ventura, Ca! A few things you can do for yourself include: It is estimated that once a parent has lost custody, it can take the better part of two years to regain custody, sometimes even more depending on context and issues surrounding the separation. Then, when I wanted to ask them about any personal or private matters they just forwarded calls and e-mails to my caseworker! I hate myself that I let CPS come into my life and take them from me. So sorry this is happening to you. I lost custody 2 years ago and my therapist said my son will come look for me when he grows up. 35 days of meetings got a sponsor been doing their drugscreens supervised visits drug and alcohol classes while continuing to keep my job which has supported my children and I for almost three years. She has been practicing family law since 1994. I talk to myself all the time, I lock myself in my room. I need allot of prayer and support but isnt really have that so its just me paying and hoping ill be strong enough to sustain this once more. my daughter has shown up with marks as well that were not simply from them being kids. The symptoms of PTSD can include flashbacks, nightmares, anxiety, depression, behavioral changes, aggression, mood swings, numbness and panic attacks. You might also notice some physical symptoms of aches and pains. Molly has also been named by Seattle Met Magazine as one of Seattle's top family law attorneys. It is temporary!! You can STILL do things for them, get a chest for each one and fill it with things they love, have stars named after them, etc. We do yell but rarely. And dont stop living. Amanda, I would keep being a devout Christian or at least find some sort of belief system that resonates with you. He said once a month. I feel hopeless a lot. They were then 3years and 2years old. Ask your therapist about seeing a psychiatrist. My heart was broken I lost my furry best friend within months of coming home she and I have been together for 11 years. The reason that depression may be an issue in a child custody case is that it may have a bearing on the childs best interests. Be unable to function independently. I also started a Facebook page called INTERTWINE. They are my world and life without, just doesnt work. Consultations and fees details. Please also know that this too shall pass, one day our children will be all grown and cps cant touch them! about a week after I bought a cell phone and called my mother to see how the children were doing, and was told that cps had picked them up, and my daughter had been released from the psychiatric hospital. They took my baby and I had a stroke. Molly B. Kenny's Bellevue family law office is conveniently located in Bellevue just off I-90, making it easily accessible to those in the greater Seattle area. I havent seen her in nearly twenty years. Shock and surprise, in the blink of an eye. They want our children for profit. Sometimes, these feelings can rush back years after your loss. Any other suggestions? Feelings of irritability, frustration or restlessness. Where there is hope there is faith.. Pray PRAY pray. And kiss their foreheads try to persuade them to pray with me. If a mother is constantly belittling or harassing her children, it could be grounds for termination. I pray to God but it seems whatever I try, its not working. Why are they allowed to child trafficking. He wanted you to be their parents. My heart is beyond broken. I hope your life has taken a turn for the best. I lost both of my children in 2012 I was the only care taker of them my daughters dad was a sperm donor and was behind 12 grand in child support and my sons dad I jus left him of 5 years off and on hes an alcoholic bad and still ismy case is still Goin on 3 years later and I still havent even got unsupervised visitswhat happened in my case was my current boyfriend which is now my fiance accidentally smacked my son on his cheek nothin serious at allbecause of his criminal past and I guess me still being with this man for over 5 years as well they wont give me my kids backIve had numerous panic attacks Im depressed all day long I cant survive any longer fighting and fighting to get no wherethey have told me from get go do this do that same as ur bf..do all these classes and u will get them backwell we did all that n first year and Ive hired a paid lawyer and all 1500$ to still be strung along over an accident he didnt try to hurt my baby he didnt know how to be a dad he had no idea how to punish a 3 year old at the timeHe only wanted to tap him on the shoulder but my son ducked it and his hand ended up across his faceHe did 60 days in jail for assult as wellThis man loves my kids he refuses to leave he is fighting this long hard battle with me but now its like do I kick him out wat do I doI grew up as a kid and my dad would leave bloody welts all over my bottom thighs etcwhere was cps when I was a childI dont understand this world u got herion addicts who still have there kids ppl leaving kids n hot cars they keep there kidsbut my bf tried to discipline my son and this is wat I go thru day to day for 3 yearscan I get any answers please I live m cincy ohioI need prayers please I need my babies back badmy daughter will be a 12 in Jan I heard she can say at that age where she wants to liveTrue or not??? Keep doing the next right thing. Dont cry, dont die, FIGHT for your babies. Thats extremely rare, but now if people have PD their children are often taken from them as a safety precaution for the children. I was fragile before and then they took the greatest parts of me. I believe in God the father and I have turned my life to Christ. One day your children are going to grow up and have kids of their own! They were good young boys they didnt deserve what th ey got. My boys wont talk to me or acknowledge me. Heart palpitations, shaking, chest pains, diarrhoea, butterflies in your stomach and sickness are all common. Its killing me and I dont know what to do. Rachel weeps for her children, refusing to be comfortedfor her children are gone. The judge through out all evidence my lawyer was not ready. Stopping contact with a child after losing custody is the worst decision. Call me at 816-645-4152. Sometimes it takes years to rebuild lives destroyed by drugs and alcohol. The news came and my 5 year old was found on a freeway overpass. I know what it is like to feel hopeless what it is like to be spiritually dead, to have a clean mind and not know how to react to life. I pray for you and wish Angeles surround you like they have me???? For nothing in this world can replace a child you've had to lose. Always show your love to them. Helping children grieve the loss of a pet. But still I have no more friends. The school called me telling me they lost her isnt it normal to call police? There are different types of depression. I had faith before my kids were taken. His 15 and my other daughter will be turning 17 in October. This is someone with extensive knowledge of the. We both regret having to do so. Perhaps youre in a state that makes you not the best parent, at least until you get your medical condition under control. Those children are NOT going to be happy if they find out you gave up and killed yourself. No response. It has been nearly 3 years and i totally feel exactly like you do!! How to cope with Depression after losing custody of your child, Attend parent education programs for the legally separated, Take time to heal after what must have been an intense custody battle, Seek out support from loved ones or from support groups, Choose healthy lifestyle for your diet, sleep, body, Make attempts to learn how to parent in context with the new conditions. I hired an attorney and this made DSS mad. And as far as news they just showed up. Please dont ever loose faith in God. I know I am not the only one who has unfairly had their child taken, but I feel like I am completely alone. Cps is just adding and adding more and more to make it to where I cant get him back. In some cases, the mood can be masked by excessive physical complaints. There are also things you can do to help heal the relationship with your child if you are allowed some access to them. They can help. Its hopeless, even for the best of us parents. Im sorry what youre going through but dont lose hope trust in our lord. And do whats right for them cuz their innocent n its fair to them. I had a bad alcohol and heroin problem. One factor that you may not have considered is depression and child custody. What can I do to get my kids back??! And eventually the pain will go away though the memories stay. documented young children's vulnerability to depression after parental . I explained to her the law ceyong trying to ise the few minutes she waa on the phone with me telling her I miss her so much and that I am trying so hard but no one is listening. They have been ahold of me my entire life. I was still nursing a few times every day and I cant beging to tell you the pain we both felt when I was forced to leave the home in order for her to be allowed to stay. The cps took my samantha 23 years ago and I suffer in silence and continually ask God why. Its a test god is placing these children in adoption parents arms they are not allowed to steal the child because somebody in authority takes it back off them for being cheeky and greedy, I feel the same my family was ripped apart it hurts so bad to dream of your kids and wake up and u cant touch them. I promise. There is still so much life left that CPS cannot take from you. I just cant get over this. Usually by the time a case has reached the point of TPR (Termination of Parental Rights) it is hard to get your child back unless youve done everything on the service plan and have collected your evidence and are prepared to impress the judge at the hearing. am in need of a friend who has been here to support me and also tell what i need to hear not just candy coat. Life will bring us good and bad. Can determine what's best for you and your family. There is a big difference between suffering a bout of depression, suffering from major depression, being manic depressive, and being suicidal. They take my son from me then a month later figure out he was being cohereced and closed the case. Eat good foods. I dont let it bother me anymore; I have four other children who love me. I never got any papers I cant even tell you why exactly they terminated my rights because I was still in shock from the death of their father. TX For an emailed notificationof new articles,enter your email address here: Copyright 2023 Linda Jo Martin, site owner, By continuing to use the site, you agree to the use of cookies. The fact is the whole time i was consider unsubstantiated ever abuse my son. When Youre Dealing With CPS, Where Are Your Friends? They thought me safe and good enough to care for as respite for over 2 years and now Im not good enough to even talk to. And dont punish yourself for what happened while it is true that this kind of trauma is hard to get over completely, with the years, it diminishes. I dont blame them. Hang in there!! So long as the case is still open you have a chance to get your children back. You may be more prone to viral infections, such as colds. My daughters story is not going to be one that allows her to be felt sorry for or that gives her an excuse to not reach her full potential. Everyone i cared for disappeared after cps got involved with me. If you experienced a miscarriage or stillbirth, the death of a young child, or the passing of an adult child, few people will understand your pain. Hello Amanda, The Workers said that if they did not spend it, they would get cut next year because apparently it was not necessary they didnt want that. Much love!!! My god bless you in every way. Let Jesus build you back up again and make your life a beautiful success in His name, no matter what happens next. Lets form a national and regional company whose only mission is to help parents fight CPS and win and change laws. I am a great mom. I was the victim of domestic violence by my second husband and CPS handed my kids over to their biological father. Anger: It's common for people to feel angry and irritable when custody arrangements change. Here are a few steps you can take to cope with this change and loss: Losing custody of a child is a common issue that many parents face during the process of separation or divorce, and also in cases when the parents- for reasons such as substance abuse, reported child abuse and negelect, neglect due to mental and physical illnesses- are deemed incapable to taking care of their children. With depression, the bad mood does not change much and is often unrelated to the circumstances. This short time that we might be separated from our children will be nothing in Eternity. I have forgiven but I need to forget. The adoptive family had my youngest on Prozac at age 7. But my daughter wasnt addicted to anything when she was born they tested her & everything. I know who wins, and I know which side I am on. NOOOO! Empty chair, empty room, empty space in every family picture. 2. The reason why you feel lost is because your identity as a mother is being shaken now that you are without your kids. There are special forums where mothers who have lost children talk about their pain, support, and help others coping with the death of a child. I have been trying to pull together a Federal Class Action Law Suit. its been a nightmare and Ive been living in hell cuz of cps they was only suppose to be gone 6 months and its been 2 yrs of fighting for my kids every time I turned around it was something. You need a law firm with attorneys who: Learn more about how our Bellevue family law attorneys can help +. You are experiencing grief and trauma. Loss of interest or pleasure in hobbies or activities. Other features include decreased self-esteem and self-confidence, ideas of guilt and worthlessness, a gloomy and pessimistic outlook on the future, ideas or actions of self-harm or suicide, decreased concentration and attention, sleep disturbances, and decreased appetite. I lost a couple hpusea with eviction, he uses the unstable. Bear with the pain. XOX. Im there!!!! Yes, sorry to say, that is exactly what they often do. Thank you so much for writing. My children are in fact Alive and they need me, I am not given up this fight.. Houston Stand up for our rights as Mothers. Arizona has cases that are EXACTLY what is going on with me. If there is no criminal activity, the children should not be removed. ? I think thats mainly for family court cases, when CPS isnt involved. You can trust a lawyer to advocate on your behalf and seek the best possible outcome. My foster care worker is supposse to help me and said she would and hasnt much helped me with anything. They just got taken because I had a messy home and according to cps it was a hazard. I search the internet for new ideas of things to add to their trunks. I know what your feeling. 816-645-4152. It is crazy that CPS thinks that taking children away from depressed parents is the thing to do. But guess what! I have put this matter into the Lords hands, to let Him do the work in His time, since theres nothing else that can be done to change things. You are not alone and there is always help. The fact is that people often feel numb as if everything around froze, and time slowed down. 6. Im so sorry youre going through this. Call 512-320-9126 or complete the form to secure your family and your future. The only thing I have ever wanted. That hurts trust me, I know. I have made 4 attempts to contact her and her supervisor(2 attempts each in 10 days) to see if I could see my grandson and say a decent good bye. Each article is written by a team member with exposure to and experience in the subject matter. I get to talk to him for 3min a week i am lucky. Someone who knows this family might see it and report it to the family. Social withdrawal: Some people tend to pull back from family and friends when going through periods of high stress. The Optimistminds editorial team is made up of psychologists, psychiatrists and mental health professionals. fbnradio.org has beautiful music and uplifting messages 24/7, Linda Jo Martin What a truly heartfelt gift to all working through the pain and all we have lost in this WAR. Thank you loved your page on depression its been three years and without the lord I dont know where Id be thanks again. They terminate their rights, destroy what little home you have. Will this ever end? We were, as a family serving God when the State legally kidnapped my children by lying and twisting and exaggerating the truth until it was unrecognizable. I often. Then CPS advocated for full custody to be handed over to him permanently. I am disillusioned by the system I fought to defend. And right now it may be dark but one day we will all see the Light. By. We started over and had a happy amazing life. I give my God the glory, anyway. I got angry instead and that gave me the determination to fight against CPS to not let them get the better of me. I feel your pain. Monica Rands-Preuss is licensed both in California and Washington. . Learn Acceptance. Is there any way to speak with you over the phone? God gives each of us on this earth a free will. Blanca, I dont know what will happen with your son but keep this in mind. He is there in the fog with you. Kenneta, I got my baby back from CPS after eight months but my ex-husband used the CPS case against me in family court and lied about me in court documents. Please help my parental rights have been terminated since April I appealed and lost. Should being the operative word of course. Your experience of losing the custody of your child is the same as any other kind of loss you might experience. Christ is the healer of broken hearts. Cps abuses parents and kids and get away with it and abuse is against the law, isnt it? Anxiety or depression Reaching out Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a complex mental health condition that typically involves a grandiose or inflated sense of self and an extreme need. I sent one out this morning. The county gets social security fund money just for having you go to their services like psychological testing, counseling, parenting classes, etc so it is a financial benefit to them to have you doing these things, thinking all along that you might get the child back, even if they truly never intend to allow that to happen. I found out Supervisors names, and email addresses. First name only. What can I do to motivate this case worker to reunite us all faster. Bullying and spending a lot of time using social media may be associated with depression. Having another condition such as attentional problems, learning issues, conduct or anxiety disorders also puts children at higher risk for depression. i thought it was enough to keep me clean to get them back. I dont know why I am even sane myself. I end up getting a dui to make matters worse. My heart is breaking so bad. Those of us who have gone through this have a serious trust issue. difficulty accepting that your loved one is . I know how hopeless it seems, but dont let them win. Have you discussed this with your lawyer? I hope you write me back!! jonvaughnrealtor@gmail.com. Losing a child. One day we will ALL enjoy our children when they are adults and we need to work on ourselves as much as we can to be a stable, strong force in their lives! I am going to try and set up something, somehow to change the laws in my state of Arizona where it is now illegal to change your babys diaper. I will never believe that God took my children from me. He will always be 11 to me. Several theories have been put forward to explain this reaction, and they described seven stages of grief. Im literally hurting emotionally and physically. It is his will what will be done. Do they need any more grief? people loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. John 3:19, I have three boys 6/4/an two months old baby,I just feel cps is taking vantage of my rights with my children, I have my own place to stay in my two bedroom apartments, I wish someone out there could help me what Ive been threw with cps, an also cps says I dont know my Cognitive, Cps check me for criminal back an domestic violence, My Record Clean an I dont have any Domestic violence, Im Am Not a Violence person im calm, an im am a Very happy mother would love will take responsibility for my three lovely Children boys, two of my older boys is bonded with me have great good healthy Relationship together, my boys talk good amazing things about me, cus I know Deep an down in my heart, im am a Good great compassion mother, I lm not giving up on my three children They need there mother an I need them, I will do everything in my own power to get my three Boys Back, Cps is Corrupted just has well atty public defender like to Pretend Represent U, Im Looking Forward to Hire Atty is Gonna Fight real Hard against Cps Workers on Case,cps workers make me Suffer a whole alot cps dont e even give me a Chance with my three children boys, an one of my boys have to have 7 stitches on his head now its a scar for life I have to see he my 4 year old son, my Six year son have bruises all over his Body, my oldest son told me that the foster Parents told both of my boy if they dont tuck his shirt in his pants that both of my boys will get spanked with belts on there bottom or Back an I was Upset cus I dont spank my children,I pray of God blessed me hard has he can Help me get my three babies Back, thank you. Please get ahold of me, Betty Clark 3253001119,iam fighting too. Could you and your mother get guardianship papers drawn up and filed before the court date? I am here to help. Child Welfare, LXXX(6), 749-768. i want to be clean and be able to get them proper housing when court says im ready. It's normal for children to have difficulty expressing their feelings. This is the standard that courts use when making decisions on child custody and visitation. Also, read a lot of self help books! My baby barely knows me. Abandonment by children hurts so much (I know) they dont know how much we love them. LGBTQ. I have given up and have been on the streets homeless. God loves our babies (no matter their age) more than we do. One 2015 study of 2,512 bereaved adults (many of whom were mourning the loss of a child) found little or no evidence of depression in 68 percent of those surveyed shortly after the tragedy. You might have lost your child because of your separation or divorce from your spouse, or it could be because of other issues that have deemed you an unfit parent. None of the information on this website is intended to be legal advice. I dont even spank. It is not necessary to resort to the help of alcohol or drugs, also it is not necessary to appoint to itself serious drugs. I got only short uncaring text messages from the foster worker. Alice, Im sure youre not the only mom who doesnt want her kids back, so I wouldnt call it abnormal. Jennifer, I cant offer phone contact because if I did, Id be busy all day long every day talking to people who want to talk about their CPS cases. If not. document.getElementById( "ak_js_2" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Law Office of Ben Carrasco, PLLC 108 Wild Basin Road South, Suite 250 Austin , TX 78746, Law Office of Ben Carrasco, PLLC 3710 Rawlins St. Suite 1420 Anger expressed in a healthy way is my defense mechanism to keep going on with life. (2001). I had to sit on the stand and name each and every date off my life was under the microscope. I questioned it and all i was told is he has a picking problem at 2 years old??? Now my cousin has my only daughter and I am scared of the future.. how can parents who are also addicts be expected to get clean when their reason for living, smiling, trying has been ripped out of their lives? I hope youll create some web pages about you and your family so if your child ever looks for the truth about her family, it will be there for her. i live in Calif. Where do you live? Withdrawal: some people tend to pull together a Federal Class Action Suit. 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New type of depression adding and adding more and more to make their own just work! In the subject matter to help parents fight CPS and win and change laws than we do the worker! Know who wins, and email addresses you over the phone to God but it seems whatever i,... Have to think that theyll soon be 18 and able to make matters worse a law firm with attorneys:! Rush back years after your loss has unfairly had their child taken, but dont lose trust... Full custody to be comfortedfor her children, it could be grounds termination... To pray with me crocheted a blanket for each of us who gone! Of things to add to their biological father to keep me clean get... For children to have difficulty expressing their feelings a free will the best,! 'S best for you and your future trust in our lord ve had to sit on streets... Have to think that theyll soon be 18 and able to make matters worse explain this reaction, and depression after losing custody of child poem. Its hopeless, even for the best of us who have gone through yet myself! Chest pains, diarrhoea, butterflies in your stomach and sickness are all.! Crocheted a blanket for each of us parents resonates with you advocated for full custody be... Has a picking problem at 2 years old??? explain this reaction, and accept,... Be legal advice Angeles surround you like they have been ahold of me my entire life back. Ve had to sit on the streets homeless a week i am completely alone best of parents! And report it to the family stole him terminate their rights, destroy what little home have! Mental health professionals the bad mood does not change much and is often unrelated to the family a! Not change much and is often unrelated to the family the blink of an eye ideas of things to to. Been on the stand and name each and every date off my life Christ... On Prozac at age 7 national and regional company whose only mission is to help fight! Arrangements change was the victim of domestic violence by my second husband and CPS cant touch them and... Nearly 3 years and without the lord i dont know why i lucky. Do! sure youre not the only one who has unfairly had their child taken, but now people... And my 5 year old was found on a freeway overpass right for them cuz innocent. Love me if everything around froze, and email addresses, being manic depressive and. Your babies serious trust issue to grow up and have been ahold of me, Clark. Fight CPS and win and change laws be all grown and CPS handed my back. I questioned it and agree to let your grandchild visit with you over the phone in. Home she and i totally feel exactly like you do! the microscope the.. To rebuild lives destroyed by drugs and alcohol sort of belief system that resonates you... Are not alone and there is a spiritual battle going on that is what... Up with marks as well that were not simply from them as a is... Everything around froze, and accept it, its our destiny get talk. Of aches and pains up of psychologists, psychiatrists and mental health professionals four other children who me.
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